Overdue

I'd like to be able to tell you I've had a hectic last week that hasn't left me with a single second to type a blog but anyone who's been watching me the last few days - shame on you if you have, by the way - will know that I have in fact had precious little to do and so this latest entry is decidedly overdue and, from the looks of the first sentence, decidedly uninspiring.
I'll tell you one thing that is inspiring though - the internet. Anyone checked it out lately? Lots of amazing stuff on there. You'd have thought it would have been publicised more...
I really can't imagine what it must have been like to have lived in a time when you actually needed to know things and, if you weren't in possession of the relevant knowledge, you would then need to speak to real people or open up a book to find out the crucial nugget of information. Take yesterday's example - I wanted one of the characters in my play to make a comment about how he would run away from a fight when they were retired by zooming away on his mobility scooter. Could I remember the words 'mobility scooter'? No (you probably guessed that). And so, like any good writer who ensures his research is thorough and professional, I googled 'electric buggy old people drive' and, hey presto, within seconds I'd gone from awkward wordy reference to accurate vehicle. Huzzah! And this was only moments after discovering that there was a bird called a 'wigeon'. Trust me, that was an important find.
And then there was the Marmite website. Check it out.
On the news front, the redrafting of my play is coming along nicely, so expect to hear lots more about that in the near future. In other news, Sepp Blatter has become FIFA president again - probably not entirely fairly - and a couple called Gay and Alan came 3rd in last night's Britain's Got Talent semi-final after a stirring performance with the hand bells.
Oh, and I've just spent 4 days saying things like 'Jesus, we have a question' in a terrifyingly accusatory tone and screaming 'crucify him' and 'kill this man' into the face of someone who is not only about a foot taller than me but also has a much finer beard than I could ever muster. Going to www.themarkdrama.com may help you understand that last sentence better if you haven't been following my movements that closely recently. For a man who once famously said 'I don't act' ('famously' being a slight exaggeration), I seem to have been very bad at keeping my word, what with this being the second play in the space of 6 months. Before you know it, I'll be donning tights and make-up and saying things like 'it's behind you'...
For now, this blog must be behind me and I must plough on with scene four. Spoiler: a pizza man delivers an empty pizza box. He's not made out of pizza, if you're thinking this is all becoming quite Sci-Fi (does anyone else remember the monster made out of curry from Red Dwarf season four, by the way?), but he's certainly quite cheesy.
Note to self: don't try and include that joke in your play. It wasn't funny.