Something tells me it’s not going to be quite as good a year for flags as 2012.
Perhaps for just a few minutes, as Sky’s Breaking News banner informs us that Kate has finally given birth after no doubt enduring hours of ‘gruelling labour’ (their words, not mine), we will raise our flags for one final hurrah, clinging on to the spirit of 2012 by our union-jack-painted fingernails. But weeks of overenthusiastic, shoulder-dislocating-levels of waving? I’m afraid I can’t see it.
2013 looks like going down in history as the ‘meh’ year. The year in which we sit around in dusty cafes mourning the loss of 365 days we’ll never have back, flicking through channel after channel in desperate search of five precious minutes of blind 5-a-side football to keep the spirit flowing. No Olympics. No Euros. No World Cup. Not even a Jubilee. Just 365 days of normality. 365 days of life.
Stifle the yawn if you can and remember that fridge magnets, t-shirts, posters and who knows what else are providing the solution to our national stupor: When all the light seems to have gone, Keep Calm and Carry On (italics, capitals and the opening phrase are mine – lawyers on standby).
Carry on. Continue as before, with a song in your heart and a flag in your hand, and do it with a calmness that will keep the neighbours at bay. Sounds like a plan.
Amidst the calm, permit yourself an ounce of excitement that the next 12 months might in fact offer more than expected. 2012 promised much and delivered much, much more. 2013 promises precious little and so just imagine how surprised we’ll all be if something good happens. The re-opening of Woolworths perhaps? The creation of a new business called Banana that wipes Apple and Orange out of the financial fruit-bowl? A new Sam Lenton novel/play/film/blog post?
Possibilities abound. If any abound in my direction, I’ll be sure to let you know but for now let me simply bid you a ‘Satisfactory New Year’ and I’ll leave you to put those flags back in the attic for the next 6 months or so. The moment the news comes, you have my permission to go crazy – Olympic crazy, if you will – and risk wrist injury with every fibre of your being as we welcome the Union Jack back into our lives one more time.
Over to you Harry to plan 2014’s magic moment…
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BREAKING NEWS! (of the non-Sky variety): My novel Accidental Crime is currently only 99p on Kindle. A complete and utter bargain, even if I do say so myself. Go on. Treat yourself. Tell yourself that Sam says it's OK. And then tell others. There really are no limits to this news.
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